Sunday, November 13, 2016

Jealousy, The Ugly green monster

       lately I have really felt a lot of jealousy and I'm not entirely sure why but I have and so to feel whole again or feel more like Anna the way I feel most happiest I have decided to write about it, even though it feels silly in my eyes to be jealous of this stuff! I have lost a lot of self confidence in myself the last few years simply because I dwelt so heavily on what others say to me, say about me and I'm really honestly done feeling like I'm truly not worthy of being happy any more! If you're seeing any red flags go up here as I continue to write this out though please just know that I really do love me and I'm working on feeling good about where I am in my life more than you may realize:)

     Just today in church I felt lonely and that they are so compleatly sick of seeing me here I am not worth that much to them or anywhere and then I realized that first off that really was Satan in my head and secondly I don't go to church to see them, I don't do a lot of what I do in my life for anyone but me and that truly is the way it should be. We truly have been given the greatest gift of all to have our brother, savior and best friend shed his innocent blood for each and every single one of his us his children and if we cant feel the strength and the power that come with that then come join me and the rest of the world in figuring out the love he gives and shares with each of us every step of the way!

     Jealousy truly is the big ugly green monster in our lives that leaves us in hard times probably more then we would like it to and to that I say be kind to those around you be open to listening and understanding the love that our brother and savior Jesus Christ. We never know what trials we each have been given in our lives but I am sure that we all have them and we also all have the agency to choose for ourselves what we do what we eat what we say what we think even and non of us really are perfect by a long shot but we are so immensely loved and cared for by our earthly parents and our Heavenly Parents as well!

      I have always wanted to stay happy and that is up to me every single day that I am given to be here on this earth and maybe even after! I love my savior and brother Jesus Christ and his unwavering love and understanding and guidance we are in need of in our day to day lives and I am so incredibly grateful for this time of year for my family and for my amazing friends in my life and  I can't wait to see what is in store for me next